Game-A-Day: Classic - Gunbird [ARC]

I don't know what it is about H.Shooters that I hate and V.Shooters that I love, but this V.Shooter I love even more than usual. It's funny. It looks fantastic (but then again, so do most Psikyo games). It's funny. It controls fantastically. It's funny. Each character has their own shooting style instead of having to choose in-game, making all the characters more than just cosmetic and no longer having you worry about losing your progress by a mistiming. It's funny, especially if you have a partner so the characters interact (personally, I just set a player 2 and turn on the cheats to make them invincible and then forget them). It's got a bit of bullet hell to it, but eh. It's a good, fun game.



And that's the last of the classic reviews. From now on they'll all be fresh!

Game-A-Day: Classic - Demon's Crest [SNES]

This is a spin-off of the Ghost's 'n Goblins series staring a demon that's supposed to be, i dunno, the real devil, or something. He can hover using his wings, spit fire, hold onto walls, cast spells, and change his element with collected crests so he can do other stuff too. It's a bit open, like Mega Man X, with you able to choose where to go next and backtrack to stages to open new areas. It even has some mode 7 effects that are pretty cool. Would probably be even more impressive if I hadn't already seen it in Illusion of Gaia, among other games, though. It's real fun, and actually not as hard as the series it's branched off of. I really recommend it.

Game-A-Day: Classic - 007: Nightfire [GBA]

God, even more proof that EA is incapable of putting out a good portable game. Also more proof that FPS games shouldn't be on handhelds. Or at least not on something slightly more powerful than an SNES. It's slow. It's clunky. It's ugly. It sounds...okay, I guess. It's based on a franchise I hate. Fuck this game.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Twofer!

Irem Skins Game [SNES]

The title is a lie! It's not about skin, or about people showing skin, but is instead about...golf. And as far as golf games go I guess it's...alright. The swing meter goes super fast though. Hard to get it down.



Castlequest [NES]

A puzzler/platformer that features a short, stocky prince that jumps floatily and has a stubby little dirk. Not...not that great. I really couldn't get that far because of that stupid stiletto.

Game-A-Day: Classic - The Sims (various editions) [GBA]

Gott, EA can't put out a good portable game to save their lives. All of the portable Sims are awful. That's all I can say about them. Fuck these games.

Game-A-Day: Classic - No Rules: Get Phat [GBA]

Tch.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Lester the Unlikely [SNES]

Okay, I know that the main character is supposed to be nerdier than Urkel and that how he moves is supposed to reflect that, but the controls are either awkward, clumsy, convoluted, or any combination of the three and it's hard to fight through them. Not to mention puzzles range from obscure to simplistic, further detracting from everything.
Furthermore, I had a lot of problems with the sound cutting out. Fuck this game.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Binary Land [NES]

This is a great puzzle game from Hudson Soft. You have to guide two penguins who are in love to the end of a top-down maze filled with spiders and their webs. However, they're both separated by a wall down the middle, and when you move one the other mirrors the moves. You also have to get them at the goal at the same time, so no getting one then the other. They're both armed with bug spray to take care of the webs and spiders. If you run into one of the webs, your penguin gets stuck and has to be freed. If they both get stuck, you're fucked.

Wow, that's a rather ham fisted description. Oh well, no matter, as this is an awesome game. The only thing that I didn't like about it is that like almost all games of the age (this coming out back in '85), the music is a digitized version of a classical song and it repeats for the whole game. But what do you expect; they're programmers, not musicians.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Bonkers [SNES]

Capcom has made some damn good Disney games. Aladdin, Chip & Dale, Darkwing Duck. This game is not part of the club. It controls horribly, it sounds horrible, it looks...not so great.

...There's nothing else I can really say about it. It's just another bad licensed game. Pretty disappointing, especially when compared to the other said games.

Game a day: Classic - Ninja Wariors, Again [SNES]

This is one of the few beat-'em-ups that I really like. It has good controls, good graphics, good music, and has a nice challenge without being too hard. All in all good fun.
But there's not much else to say about it. Plus, if I look at it objectively, this is probably pretty average. Of the beat-em-ups that I've played, this is probably fifth on the list after (inpo) TMNT III and IV, Sailor Moon [ARC], and Final Fight.

Still, I never said that I would be objective, so this gets a

Game-A-Day: Classic - Super Mario RPG [SNES]

God, this game is boring. Boring boring boring. And I can't blame it with my being bored by RPGs as a whole nowadays, as I was bored the first time I played it. It's just another square RPG with the Mario universe feeling tacked on as an afterthought. Who wants to play with a bit of marshmallow fluff when you could have had Toad or that doll when you could have had Luigi (who's never even seen, heard from, or even mentioned)? I'd like to also point out that those characters and their people have never been heard from again (of course, it's probably 'cause Square has the rights to them or something, but humor me). The story just plods along, and the combat system's gimmick (pressing buttons to do better attacks and take less damage) seems wholly unpolished (which is funny as all the pre-rendered characters are all shiny and plastic looking). And then there's the isometric perspective which makes the "platforming" elements a pain in the ass, like Scurge: Hive. Not to mention the environment seems to blend in at times. And who in the hell in the target audience knows about musical theory? Shit.

Basically, Super Mario RPG does everything wrong that Paper Mario does right five years later.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Polarium Advance [GBA]

Yes. Polarium Advance. On the GBA. I didn't know about it until recently. It's the Polarium we know on the DS, but with some improvements and omissions. First thing first, no more challenge mode, instead focusing on the puzzle mode, giving you one puzzle everyday for a year, and with over 365 puzzles that's almost four times the amount in the first one. And on top of that, there's an added challenge where each puzzle will give you two points on the grid that you have to connect in a certain amount of spaces while clearing the board after you've cleared it at least once. Sometimes you'll get it your first time on the board, but others you really have to rethink how to clear it. Second, instead of having to have a solid block of one color, only the horizontal rows have to be the same color. This makes some boards harder and some easier. Thirdly, there are three new special tiles. Hurdle tiles, tiles that sit on the edge that you can't move over; multi-tiles, wild cards that act as empty spaces that will switch to whatever color is needed to clear the row; and solid tiles, tiles that hold other tiles that let's them drop down when cleared.

Maybe it's just that I was sitting down and playing a whole bunch of them at one time, but there's something about it that just makes you go "eh" after a while and you get sick of it. So because of that, despite the fact that it's a really good puzzle game that's better than the original, I give it a

Game-A-Day: Classic - Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom [NES]

Spoiler: The only thing related to Indiana Jones that I've seen is Young Indiana Jones.

The sad thing about this game is that it could have been really good. What brings it down is the poor graphics and counterintuitive controls. The graphics make what you're doing a bit confusing since you don't really know what level you're supposed to be at to swing across. And with the controls I keep on jumping down into lava instead of jumping forward. And, even though as I said earlier that I've never seen the movie in question (I really need to get on that), I get the feeling that if this wasn't based on a movie it would have had an intersting story. There's also the fact that I didn't know what the hell I was supposed to do until I actually went and looked it up.

I really want to blame the shortcomings of this game on the limitations of the system, I really do, 'cause, to paraphrase Jeremy Parish, bad games and good games hampered by the limitations of its time are easily confused, but I can't. This is just a plain bad game brought on by poor execution. Though, it's really not surprising considering this came from Tengen.

I give it a (very, very) generous low

Game a day: Classic - Batman - Return of the Joker [NES]

Has okay controls, good graphics, and good music, but this is all brought down by horrible, punishing level design with hidden traps, off-screen enemies, and unavoidable hits. This is all made worse when you compare it to the original NES Batman, which was utterly fantastic. Fuck this game.

Game-A-Day: Classic - Sparkster [GEN]

To both have actual posts on here and to move all the Game-A-Day stuff here, I'll also be posting existing reviews.

A solid platformer from Konami (specifically Nobuya Nakazato, who also did Contra: Alien Wars and Shattered Soldier). You play as an opossum knight who has a rocket pack. The graphics and sounds range from acceptable to decent, but when it comes to the controls, some of the advance rocket maneuvers (re: going diagonally) are hard to pull off. The use of the rocket pack does get inventive, such as using it to become an opossum screwdriver to defeat a mini-boss. Low to high challenge level, depending on the settings. I give it a high